Recount Writing-At home

WALT use 'show don't tell' to spice up our Writing.

                            At home.

On a hot Monday Evening me,Charlee,Piripi,Jean,and Taonga
were playing hide and go seek.We did coconut coconut crack
my older sister did it her name was Ariha she said, “Your In
Manawa.”I went in my mom's and dad’s room to count to 70.
They said, “I could count to in 10.’’I said,’’Yay because I don’t
like counting from 1 to 70.” When I got to 70 I looked in my
brothers room.I looked behind the door and my sister Jean
was there.My cousin Piripi was on the bed hiding under the
blanket.My body was shaking with goosebumpes. I thought
he was Taonga.I looked in my brothers old cobed  and Jean
was in there. When I walked out of the room Charlee ran
upstairs cause she thought I was Jean.When I seen Charlee I
looked through the mirror I seen Taonga he was hiding by my
doorstep to my room.When I found everyone my mum called
us up to have dinner.What an fantastic night playing hide and
go seek.It was as great as a busing bee.